The Big Lessons from Little People !

 Many a time we find ourselves going down the spiral of life, but at the center of all this storm lies the quiet .A lot of bliss is conceived right beneath the gruesome suffering that surpasses us .Take any success or a hero story ,it’s all about learning to dwell in this state of commotion and cry. Under all this chaos if you can figure out that dwindling call, the one little thought which transforms into a feed for the fire reborn, that’s exactly when u reach the eye of the storm.

Yes, my sons were just little flints of rock, but it was them who rekindled all the joy and hope that I believed was lost. Before Marriage everyone around loved me without doubts and conditions, it was a really, really big world with loads of loving people in it. All I was left with now was my hubby, who loved me full well ,the one who could effortlessly say it all through his eyes .He was toiling day in and day out (almost 16 hours a day), to build a strong future for his family. My big and small dreams, a beautiful son who looks upon me as I were some super hero. 

Things got way too tricky in the next phase of my life.I was blessed with a life that most of the people could only dream of,still  I would drench my pillows for no reason, I figured out I was battling solitude, they call it postpartum depression in modern days. I realized that I din have that big bunch of people who used to stick with me all the time. I had to either move on or run away from this reality. One thing I was sure, am too bold a lad in my making. I knew for sure my son would learn from what he receives as a series of life events.

I started redecorating the house every other week for my son, we played loud music, loitered streets late night. We would sing rhymes and learn alphabets at our big terrace with no one around, only birds and airplanes overhead. I started playing along. Yay! I finally knew how to deal with the devil. My lil angel was my defender, companion, and a remedy for this aching ulcer!

He was 1.5 years old now, when I came across this contest from a baby store that was to open shortly in our place. It was a fancy-dress competition. I dressed him up as a tiny little mouse with all power tools and safety gears, to pull out his cheese from a handmade mouse trap. I taught him to sing the rhyme “INCY WINCY SPIDER”, and finally he would shout out “NEVER GIVE UP”. Out of 53 participants till age 4, they chose only one winner and it was him. He won a coupon worth 14000 INR to purchase all baby amenities at the store. Bravo! All his educational toys, High chairs and so many other supplies in his own earning. Till that day I used to scowl at myself for not bringing home a penny, but from then on, the way I saw earning totally changed.

Earning and receiving begins with a strong faith towards Giving!

Happiness does not essentially come from all the riches and luxuries we hold as non-living entities, it doubles and blooms the moment you stop chasing it, and start giving it away to people who need it.

My dear sons taught me this and many more!

Miniature Miracles II !

You are Me and More ...!

The one post on what i call these little angels,"Miniature Miracles"wasn't going to be enough for me".At the same while i didn't really want to drain out all your time and energy ,pulling out a real long theory.After reading several texts and training materials ,i really am looking forward to sharing those most appealing pointers ,these materials had to convey on the upbringing of children.Still it holds true that for every child there is an unique way to uncover the miracle that lay hidden inside of him/her, as parents we can only try to decide the most yielding method .Every child is a special child. So here goes some thoughts that i believe should reach the spirits of as many adults ,parents and parents to be.

Children would only be young once!

Once this window of opportunity gets closed,our chances to equip them with values,virtues,vision to lead rich lives would be gone,and would fade out even more when they mature.Soon it will actually be them showing us a whole new world.Put them first and life will soar.

Values that children teach you!

Celebrate the child in you- Most of the time we grown ups forget to wear that beautiful cheer and joy we teach our kids, as basic courtesy to our fellow beings.

Be curious -Those inquisitive souls that always has a question ,what is it?Why does it do that ?Where are we ?That's one other thing we stop asking as we grow up.Never leave a single question unanswered ,cause when you stop answering them,your child would have also probably started losing the energy contained in it.

Being consistently compassionate -Kids don't' find a reason to show love,and they are never waiting for the right moment ,it only comes out as if they were breathing.

Don't expect the school to do everything,that's not fair to the kids or to the school.

Reward an excellent failure!

You don't have to yell at your child spilling all the food over the ground ,when he tried serving the food to you out of love.It's a quality you should be amazed at ,and perhaps help them do it right .It's possible they teach you compassion more than you do.

Love them for who they are!

Tell them everyday, how much you love them and what you appreciate in them.Tell them you will love them ,even if they have done a mistake.Make it clear,that it was the behaviour you are upset about, and it was not about them.They now understand better why parents get upset ,and figure out a way to avoid those moments the next time.

Grades,Certificates,trophies,titles,and those big list of achievement does not conclude on the kind of demeanor a child holds,yes they do to some extent ,but let me remind you these are the extrinsic appeals.What really leaves a lasting mark is the person the child is embodied as.It's the kind of values a child will stand for...Every child will have a different style of taking it forward.There are his beliefs be it love, money,career,discipline,art,bounty and whatsoever.When a child is clear about what he wants out of his life,he already is a winner.Today we have a lot of successful people walking this earth ,but are we satisfied and happy about where we are, and how we got here? Success a measure that's so very rational,you don't have to compare one with the other, but be sure you try to make it an "one of a kind" story.

When you break a promise ,you break their heart!

Spill only if you can fulfill,children don't measure your love by the kind of promises you make,big or small !Be it an expensive toy from a disney store,or a simple act of showing up early from office.They look up to you as role models,as a man of your word.Children will actually thrive, aspiring to become one,the more you demonstrate it as parents.

Remember it's always better to show and not instruct!Trust me,the best of the qualities were imbibed from you .

Yes,there are times when it gets real tricky to find a balance between a very demanding boss at work, and this very demanding boss at home.Now it's time to saddle up,and find a really convincing explanation ,that makes them understand why it just din happen.It's always the grown ups who are in the rush,children are angels waiting to hear, and yeah waiting to be heard.When u take time to explain, they understand the situation and adopt jus like the way grown ups do .

That sure does ring a bell !

Do we really look into their eyes when we answer most of their questions,are we checking our bills ?Making important phone calls?Mails,surfing perhaps ..There are so many moments where we gaffe as parents.A little mindfulness ,and care is all we need to mend such situations.When you take time to explain and talk thing out to them with ,just as much care that you would employ in fixing your broken iphone ,or probably the newly bought jewellery.Children clearly get the message "i am loved, and i am important ".It takes a lot of patience and time at the start ,but children are fast learners ,they will easily relate to such situations when it crops up the next time,and you won't believe ,they make better judgments and decisions than us.

Love their Ideas!

The more you trust,the better they get.
Strong decision,Innovation,Being a Sport, Perseverance,Being Consistent ,Scheduling ,any idea where the birthing of these great virtues took place?

Yes there are trainings, but the ones we inherit during childhood ,"AT HOME SWEET HOME" it's simply peak performance you can expect.You set a platform to explore these talents that lay beneath.The reward is building a confident child who does not care about losing,all the focus now is on the doing and not on the vitality of success.

A beautiful art, outta the strongest love on earth! These angels were sent out here to do God's work. In letting them live life to their fullest, our love as man and woman finds another reason to win again. A resonating reminder of the love so profound. To all those wonderful parents trying  and never tiring ...

Credits to
Family Wisdom by Robin Sharma
Secret by Rhonda byrne
Power of positive thinking by Norman Vincent Peale
Kids in the House -Youtube Channel
Julie Lythcott -Ted talks
The good dinosaur (inspirations are everywhere) 
Pexels.com 

Miniature Miracles!

A behaviour that is rewarding ,is a behaviour that is repeated !

Parenting is a frequently talked ,and tested topic of these days,no wonder why!.This being a manifestation of highly dynamic societies and life styles.There is still no one rule of thumb ,or the most yielding technique in it, but to put all your hearts into it ....rather than calling it a successful tool,it is only right to call it a fulfilling experience.

You First !

It is the most fundamental step for parents, to keep the self happy and motivated ,cause this same happiness radiates back to the kids.Keeping your head clear off all the controversies,and deadlines make this an easy process.But this is not always likely to happen with grown ups ,who are built in with a killer program called OVERTHINKING.We tend put our hands into too many bowls trying to go the extra mile ,and finally end up blowing the entire roof apart.

Children do what we do !

They don't do what we tell !

Those shiny little eyes are watching you all the time and considering you to be the hero of heir world.

So play fair lads ,they are really picking up all the pieces that you've left ,and for them to build a monument or a hut it is upto to them ,But as parents we have every duty to lay in front of them the best pieces we can .And that's why i call these children a miniature version of the miracles we have been.

Tantrum Tales!

Even at the quietest of the quiet home there will have been a day that went totally off rails.These are fireworks in the sky ,that must come and go ,however scary it may seem.For it finally weaves a beautiful display that uncovers a soulful spirit.Feel no guilt for the tantrum you blew up on your kid or vice versa :)It is so human to flip the switch ,and if you have been so careful enough to not switch somebody else is definitely going to show to your kid what it is .So better you be first ,cause your child will learn to know this as a natural emotion and handle it better . Above all to be parent and child is to be in a relationship ,and relationships are messy.The care taken to tend the mess ,seems to look beautiful at the end.

Saying it out !"Sorry",its for both of you !

Apologizing, and talking mutually towards each other about the way they felt while experiencing the tantrum.It is giving back a reassurance at its best to get away with the guilt.When you talk it out ,your children feels valued and respected as human beings ,this being part of  building a strong self esteem.They understand that you are here to listen and sort out any mess that can possibly crop up.Soon with time you'll find your children having no difficulty sharing every piece of their life with you.

Still there can be a situation where it is way out of control.At these times ,sense the feeling when it starts ,move out from the proximity and find your way back to settling things after the pause.A head filled with too much of rage and worry ,can never figure out where to start.

Let them do the chores!
Julie Lythcott-Haims notes that "professional success in life, ....comes from having done chores as a kid".She also claims it as the earlier the better."It's Roll-up-your-sleeves- and -pitch-in mindset, a mindset that says,there's some unpleasant work ,someone's got to do it ,it  might as well be me...and that's what get you ahead in a workplace."Dr.Julie adds on that this data is based on the the Harvard Grant Study,the longest running longitudinal study in history ,spanning for more than 75 years.By doing these little works from the tender age ,they actually pick up a lot of impulsiveness, ownership,creativity ,leadership and a deep sense of joy in accomplishments.Work no longer seems to be work for these kids ,it's just part of crafting another big masterpiece for them.Childs play it becomes.


Does this all end here ....
There's so much to come ....

The "Grand" Mother!

Two decades ,plus five years! Those hands will never cease to wave with its precious wand , the love that it beholds .We've all evolved into class one intellectual grenades ,exhibiting extraordinary diplomacy.A grenade that so powerfully launches a big picture of the future we foresee,an explosion of the carefully designed course to this wonderfull life .Career,Skills,Ambitions,Aptitudes and Attitudes,Dreams and desires,Desperate drive towards a passion, is'nt this all so fascinating .Sadly when all these elements get ruled out of life ,saints and philosophers (if not all ,at least half the mob), even a comman man would call it a meaningless life .A life without adventure it is ...

Making me finish the last drop left in that glass of milk.Running the whole streach of the tracks jus to make me move .Some how manging to explain me how LCM works .Heated arguments over a hidden examination paper ( jus bcs my best bud got way too high marks).In Successfully having taught to make a perfect hair pleat.Confronting single handedly a Father-Daughter team.Always packed with generous giving.Where Meagre wants transforms into a multitude of bliss,i'm sure she din miss out a single adventure either.My "Mother" ,this lady upon whom I marvel ,and now that I'm a mother myself .This passionate story of love and compassion is happening yet another time,with twice as much as the energy it used to be.( grandchildren of course)

  
I wonder what happened to her own castles that were built over so high.Did the abundance of knowledge and power falter because of the menace I had been .Or was it an accident that brutally killed, all that would have become of my wonderful mother .Histories and mysteries that would have otherwise unveiled ,with the touch of my mother's magical foray.Here is an ardent child vowing to make all of your dreams come true .All that I behold and all that I become I promise I'll take the ride side to side along with you .I would see you become ,all that you wanted to become of me.To all those lovely children like me ,give this granny a place where she deserves to be.More than just being a back up at home for grandchildren and undone errands .Remember she was meant to be more than what u could be ,she gave it all with grace and glee.Now that I know I'm grounded more stronger than ever before ,I hold this lady to show her the shore.

  This is just to remind it doesn't stop with achieving our own dreams,You still have plenty of time left to go back and look back at those bold decision she has been making for you, over and over again .Remember we all have a duty to show her that it is still possible to get all that she wanted back then when she was a high schooler.The "Grand Mother" gotta tell the world it is possible now  .Never to late to shake that off her shoulders and start  your again.Tell

 your mama" yo I'm getting you a whole new world"!  

To my lovely mother !
I Thank god for giving me you !

Daily dosage of bliss!

        

     Many a times we find ourselves going down the spiral of life  ,but at the centre of all this storm lies that state of peace where we truly are able to experience the wisdom that lay beneath adversities . To be able to conceive  that bliss  placed right at the core of this system ,it is mandatory to overcome the suffering that surpasses us .

       Just when u are about to feel that lil bit of joy another trap set by the tyranny of life ,drops its ruthless veil. And in this moment of disarmament you need to behold the seed of 'faith' that will punch u straight through the hole ,and get you right there at that little space of happiness where u wanna be . 

       Dear friends don't let this pain get all your efforts go in vain ,but be sure it will come again .To not be able to feel pain ,your damn insane !

Dear friends grow big and shelter many!

Anju

Hello There!

Grow Big Shelter Many!

This has been a dream to get here at this blog,and today am glad that i have actually made a ground work to take this to a destination called eternity!Blending passion,skills and dreams together does help in talking oneself to the fondly thought dreams.You could cut past those hindrance and fears of losing ,by getting into an endeavor that your heart desires the most.I am here taking the first few steps .Its a journey towards finally getting an insight of the "Unforeseen Horizon".

I'll get this closed ,with this note of anticipation!

Cause only this craving for knowing the next moment makes life more realistic and interesting.

Help is here ...,

Anju